So I had a first date last night with a guy that is friends with Skippy (we will call him Matlock)... He seemed nice enough, but I was warned that he had a bit of a drinking problem. We went to see Tony perform at Hamburger Mary's, and had a great time, but I was having a sober evening... Needless to say, I wasn't super outgoing or anything. We walked with Tony back to my apartment, where we sat around talking for a bit, and I was settling into the "low-key" mood. He asked if I still wanted to go to The Dock (a local dance club) I said I didn't. He said he still wanted to go, and asked if I would go with him. I reluctantly agreed, cuz I wanted to hang out with him some more. When we arrived at the club, he immediately went to the bar to get a drink. He came back to me and handed me a beer (which I really didn't want) and he disappeared. Luckily Skippy was there and kept me company. Matlock would occasionally walk past me and smile and move on to other friends to talk to. The bar was really crowded and I should point out, that I hate night clubs cuz I don't like when they get too busy cuz I get pushed and bumped and touched and it really drives me insane. At 2:30am, I asked Skippy if he would take me home if Matlock wasn't ready to leave... He of course said he would be happy to. I flagged down Matlock as he was talking to 2 fairly attractive anorexic boys, and told him I really needed to get out of the club, and asked if he minded leaving. He was very obviously drunk, and he said he wanted to stay. I told him that Skippy would take me home, but that his coat was still at my house. I asked him what he wanted to do, he said he was going home with the skinny boys, and he would call me Sunday (today) for his coat. I was more than a little pissed off, and definitely hurt a bit. Skippy tried to make me feel better about the situation saying that it was just how Matlock behaves when he gets drunk. Skippy said he would probably try call me to ask if he could stay at my house so he wouldn't have to drive all the way back to BFE where he lives. Skippy told me that I shouldn't answer.

Skippy was right... 10 minutes after getting into my apartment, he called. Apparently the skinny boys decided he couldn't stay with them. He wanted to come over and "talk". He was very apologetic. I told him if he just wanted to come over so he didn't have to drive home, that he was welcome, he didn't need to go through the "I'm so sorry" song and dance. He carried on, and I let him stay (I wasn't going to let him drive drunk all the way back to his own house). Anyway, he spent most of the day with me and had brunch with my friends... When he finally went home, I had a mini-lecture from Tony... Basically asking what I was doing... I could only say I was a bit more pathetic and desperate than I was willing to talk about. I dunno what to do... I am definitely feeling the lyrics to this song from the musical Side Show. *sigh*

Like a fish plucked from the ocean
Tossed into a foreign stream
Always knew that I was different
Often fled into a dream
I ignored the raging current
Right against the tide I swam
But I floated with the question
Who will love me as I am?

Like an odd exotic creature
On display inside a zoo
Hearing children asking questions
Makes me ask some questions too
Could we bend the laws of nature?
Could a lion love a lamb?
Who could see beyond this surface?
Who will love me as I am?

Who will ever call to say I love you?
Send me flowers or a telegram?
Who could proudly stand beside me?
Who will love me as I am?

Like a clown whose tears cause laughter
Trapped inside the center ring
Even seeing smiling faces
I am lonely pondering

Who would want to join this madness?
Who would change my monogram?
Who will be part of my circus?
Who will love me as I am?

Who will ever call to say I love you?
Send me flowers or a telegram?
Who could proudly stand beside me?
Who will love me as I am?